Does it get woodsy in here?

As promised, I am here to report my camping experience. Planning to leave Sobe at noon, we obviously dont get our act together until about 3pm. We head Southwest on US-1, thinking were going to get to marshy, swampy, woodsy territory. Little did we know, our camping experience turns out to be a trip to a trailer park/retirement community/lesbian commune. It was such an odd arrival, I had to ask Dollie the receptionist, “Does it get woodsy in here?”

I bet some of you are even shocked that SoBitch would want woodsy? Well guess what, SoBitch doesn’t criticize because she is a little princess. Sobitch gets pissed when things are falsly advertised- not because she likes to complain, but because she actually likes to get down and dirty!
So we arrive to this “Miami Everglades Campground” campsite, and we check into our 16person bunk. It was more like a slumber party for overgrown kids than camping. We didn’t even bust out our mosquito repellent.

This is what I consider woodsy:


This is what we got:



It turned out to be a hella funny time, but boy was it not what we expected. We did have a great bonfire, where we actually managed to scare ourselves into a tizzy. This place was eerie! My friend claims he was being followed by these kids late at night. He walked back to the cabin to get something, and he noticed there was someone behind him. When he'd turn around, the flashlights would suddenly turn off and the kids would back up and lean on the fence in pure darkness. There were lots of “working snowbirds”(snowbirds who travel the country working in these campgrounds - is that really a career path?), really pale freaky kids, and a weird group of 40-somes playing volleyball (see picture above). It was the oddest mix of heads.

So enough negativity. Here are a couple camping ideas to pass the time and have some fun. PLAY CELEBRITY: this is kind of like sharades. Draw some names out of a hat and act out a celebrity. We made it more like identity, because we included all types of ppl. Here are some character that make for a good time:

So what’s the moral of the story? SoBitch is here to tell you, next time you go camping, skip the whole cabin/motel thing. Get yourself a true tent, bug spray, a wild firepit, and play CELEBRITY. Go on, get woodsayyyy!